Crushes.

Crush: To break pound and grind.

Everyone in some point of their life has that one crush... the one where you look at them and their smile melts your heart. One where it's never ever ever ever going to happen, but you like to hang on to that one last piece of hope that you have.

Have you ever noticed that when people are trying to figure out who you like they will try and turn anything and everything into a "sign."

I tried this the last couple days on some of my friends. I would ask them randomly if they thought I liked anyone... Most of them sat there and thought really hard about who I could possibly like, who was I talking about? about 10 minutes passed before each of them looked up and said "I don't even know where to start."

So the lesson for today is that if you can hide it well then no one will know. Ever. Also be careful who you tell because once it is out it is out.

Let me tell you a little bit about this guy that I think I might maybe have the slightest tiny bit of a crush on, he is an amazing thinker, he also is really funny, and he lives with all the right intentions of living.

But here lies the problem: If I'm not showing that I like anyone, do I really like them? or is it just all in my head?

Kicked Out.

Fifth wheel. That's a phrase I can honestly say I hate. I hate when other people feel that way and I hate when I feel that way. I do understand that people like to hang out with other couples because they have about the same relationship as each other. But really? I must say I do find it rude when you're hanging out with a couple and they are all over each other...

Am I wrong about this? Should I be the one to give up and always just walk out? Or should they be the ones that change?

Either way I know that it's going to happen again and all I can do is just walk away. Pretend that I don't care, Pretend that I have something better to do anyway. Even though I leave and feel like crap cause I feel as though I'm not special enough to have someone that special to me.

The truth is I don't need a special someone, I'm good enough by myself. With God. I found it crazy ironic that as I was leaving my friends room I turned on my iPod and the first thing I hear is "You're enough, You're enough, You're enough for me."Because the truth is God is enough for me. Sometimes I am just too ignorant to realize it. So as I was walking back to my room on this chilly, September evening I came to the realization that if it happens that I never have a significant other ever again in my whole life...it's okay. Because God is here. On my side. Loving me, like no guy could. I just need to be just okay with that. Because to be truthful once again...I was still upset after I realized that.

But now that I sit down and take a breather and think about it. What man on earth is better than God?

That's right...No one.